An appraisal of 2010

As the year closes, it's good to meditate on the amazing things God has done.

This truly has been a year of birthing. Of course birthing is two fold - the pain of labor and the joy of a new creation. Both equally important.

I look in the mirror and I don't really recognize who I am anymore.

This year I became a nurse. A confident nurse. This year I committed every part of my future to my Savior. This year I moved out for the first time because I could, not because I had to.

This year I learned I can live alone and don't need a studio apartment to survive.

This year my conception of time and its passage was shattered.

This year my parents became a couple again. This year I got my Dad back. This year my parents started reading the Bible together every day. This year I realized how beautiful I really am. That when I ask who am I? God says, "I am with you."

That my worth is not based on relationships, men or anything of this world.

This year I realized I can and do love my God more than I love my mother.

This year all my relationships took their rightful places and God ascended His rightful throne.

This year I learned to say no more than yes. This year I actively chose out of mediocre friendships and relationships. This year I gained trusted friendships back.

This year I quit school and came back to it because I finally figured out my calling.

This year I heard my heart call. I created a website. Heard a prophecy about my life.

This year I realized I will indeed change nations.

This year I realized I don't need marriage, a relationship or a husband, but I really want all these things. Really.

This year I learned to praise God in ALL circumstances.

This year I learned that nothing I own, dream, want or earn is really my own or entitled to me.

This year I learned what it means to be free because of the above.

This year I found out that marriages can in fact be wrought through prayer, made in heaven.

I found out that waiting on God is the hardest thing I've experienced yet.

I found out that I actually have really little faith and need so much more.

This year I realized that through Christ we really can overcome all evil. That satan is actually quite powerless.

This year I fasted meat for an entire week, which resulted in a word from God that has and will continue to change the trajectory of my whole life.

This year I found out what it means to be for someone and not with them - well him.

This year I stopped caring about what others think of me.

This year I saw God enter the lives of people who didn't believe Him, were distant from Him, had given up on Him.

This year I stepped out in faith and walked on water, only to realize I am more like Peter than I thought.

This year I became an intercessor. Realized how deeply I love prayer and want to pray people into healing.

This year I coined the word beast.

Most importantly this year I learned this:

That prayer is the only thing worth devoting your time to, that praising and thanking God must and should be a lifelong, non-circumstantial commitment and I have NO good apart from God. He really is MORE than enough. This life is about intimacy between me and Him. Simple.

Freedom.

Here's to 2011 - in the words of my pastor:

"2011 will therefore not only be a year of answered prayer, but also a year of growth in depth and knowledge of God."

God really does take this seriously.

So here's to a year of power. So terrified, so excited, so humbled.